If you’re not already familiar with Dr John Demartini, then get ready to be inspired. As one of the world’s most famous self-help gurus and leading authorities on personal development and human behaviour, his body of work is truly awe-inspiring!
So, when we were offered the chance to have a quick chat with him during his recent trip to Sydney, we jumped at the chance.
Here are three things we learned…
On living in alignment with our values.
If you’ve ever felt like you’ve lost direction or feel frustrated after being told to just “follow your passion”, then as Dr Demartini explains, the key is to first take some time in order to determine what your highest values are.
“Each individual lives by a set of priorities, a set of values, things that are most important to least important in their life. And whenever they’re living in alignment with what they value most, we increase the probability of living an inspiring and meaningful life.”
On sugar addiction.
Dr Demartini puts it simply… “Sugar addictions are compensations for not feeling meaning. But, if people are able to prioritise their daily life and fill their life with things that are more meaningful and inspiring to them – prioritising what they’re doing, what they’re eating, who they’re hanging out with, what their daily actions are – they automatically reduce the probability of over-consuming, overeating and sugar addiction.”
On how to break the reward cycle.
Unfortunately many of us are familiar with the guilt, shame, pride cycle, as Dr Demartini calls it. Thinking that, since we went for our run this morning, or didn’t nosedive the biscuit tin at the office, then we can reward ourselves after dinner with a wedge of cake (or two!). If this sounds like you, then rest assured you’re not alone as this is essentially a part of our human psyche.
“If you do something you feel ashamed about, you go into a sort of altruistic mode and try to sacrifice yourself for others and you’ll discipline yourself and govern yourself. But, if you go into pride mode (like if you went out and ran a few miles) and you feel proud of yourself, you’ll immediately do something lower on your list of values.”
If you want to avoid falling into this cycle, Dr Demartini says practising moderateness is key.
“These cycles are just mechanisms and we’re not here to be proud or shamed, we’re not here to take credit or blame. We’re here to do something that’s meaningful, purposeful and something that inspires us.”
We couldn’t agree more.
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